Drink nothing less than 2% milk. When you take a sip of that sweet nectar and put the glass down, there should be a healthy coat retreating down the sides, returning to its brethren. You're not fooling anyone by going under 2%. You're just drinking a joke. And what a slap in the face to cows across America. They didn't get their teets squeezed for you to water their hard work down did they? Oh, and toss a sleeve of Oreo's on top of that glass for good measure.